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It's the only logical conclusion you could come too in order to make ends meet. You'll be Single adult seeking sex sex dating site saving the money you've been helping her out with and your wife be able to help your mom out all day -! I bet in 2 months she be working full time. In all seriousness though, I do not think your wife change. I also don't think it would be wise to borrow from the -'s. The amounts you "get" now vs. Could you sell your income property or are you upside down in your mortgages? Personally I think you are at that "shit or get off the pot" stage and you don't want to leave because of the and the money which only leaves one actual option.
It sucks to feel like your damned if you do stay and go broke and damned if you don't divorced and go broke. Looking at it that way though, either way, you are going to go broke. Do you want to do it with her or without her? How do you really feel about HER after going through all this? If you her and think you can respect her again, I say accept that she always be financially irresponsible and take over that part yourself. There are few perfect people out there, is this her one and only flaw? Is she a cheater? Does she berate you in public?
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Your attraction, especially the first one to someone of the same gender, is effecting your chemistry in a way similar to adolescence, and it is your responsibility to yourself and your boyfriend to talk to him. It could be your conversation le him to choose to leave you, or not, but it is a challenging conversation you need to have. You describe knowing what you are doing is wrong, yet you also rationalize it by thinking about an outside relationship with a woman in a different category from one with a.
If you know it is not a way to live in relationship, then you are going against your own moral compass, and however your boyfriend responds won't be half as damaging as what you are doing to yourself. You do not have to compromise your own sense of right and wrong to explore your sexuality, and be able to enjoy your same sex exploration in a much more authentic level when everyone knows what's going on. I've gone down the same path, yet talked to my husband when I became overwhelmed with the feelings, before I acted on them, and he encouraged me to explore my apparent shift in sexual identity.
The feelings I felt were intense, and there were times when my judgement was affected; I wanted to move faster than he did, at times I thought about what it would be like if I made choices he wasn't comfortable with, but my ongoing relationship with him, my for him, and my respect for him far outweighed the ache in my loins.
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